Thursday, 12 May 2016

Inspiration or Craziness?

I am quite an impulsive person, and a lot of my actions and decisions are made on a whim. I got both Guinea Pigs on a whim, heck, I even got Diego on a whim. I left my well paying bank job on a whim, and then also moved to Whanganui on a whim. Sometimes this can be a bad trait, it makes me look indecisive and irresponsible. But in all honesty I do it because I am seeking happiness.


When Daisy passed away, it was the first time I was without animals in my life. Yes, mum had her cats and my now ex-partner had his dog, but I never really felt a strong connection to these animals. This left me rather depressed, and I realised then what a sad life it was to be without a pet. They help with so many emotions and responsibility that you feel wanted and needed in the world. That is why I got Schmutz, then BMO and then Knuckles. All for a want of a pet in my life. Thankfully, these whim decisions were great and were what started the foundation of this blog. If I had acted on a whim back when Daisy was alive, I would have already started this blog, and people would have got to known Daisy with all her crazy traits.


I, then got Diego on a whim. I had been looking for a dog, and wanting one, but hadn't really hundred percent thought into it. I had one look at Diego and knew I needed him in my life. I think at that point, I probably made the best choice of my life. Diego has been a constant in my ever crazy life, and has always been there. When going through a tough break up, it was nice to know someone depended on me, and if I didn't go to work, or walk him, he suffered, not me. He has in turn made this blog grow, and be something I can be proud of. He is an amazing wee dog.


The reason I type all this today, is that I have found a job in Whanganui, however it is less than desirable. I moved up to Whanganui for Diego to be with Chico, but also for myself to be with my family. My younger sisters were having a hard time as they recently moved up here as well (They are 11 and 13) and I thought that since I have no real commitments down in Wellington, I should spend the last years of their childhood with them. We are a super close family. This job I have found, is all afternoon/evening shifts, and I would work on weekends. This means that I would only see them two afternoons a week. That didn't sit right with me. Not only that, I found a lot of loopholes in the contract, that worked out for them, but not so much for me.


Should I go with the job that is there, that would teach me amazing new skills, make new friends and earn full time money, or should I find something that is more suitable hours, that allows me to spend time with my family and work on my blog? It is a tough decision, and I am still not sure where I stand. I want to be in a place of happiness and excitement, and I don't want to dread going to work each day. But then I also want to afford to buy things for Diego and I when I want, and not have to worry about the constraints of money.


I truly believe that people should follow their passions, their happiness and put their mental and physical wellbeing at the top of importance. Too many people get sucked into bad relationships, jobs or even living areas that they don't like or enjoy and they get trapped in the vicious cycle of being there. I don't want to be one of those people. I want to continually set goals, and work towards what I would consider my dream job and life. This means that I need to think about every decision, and decide whether it helps me towards my goals, or if it is just a means of money.


I look up to and respect people around me that have followed their passion, and set up something for themselves that is amazing. I love seeing the spark in people's eyes when they are doing something they love, or even when discussing the thing they love, and they get so full of emotion and passion. I want to be that person. I don't want to get caught up in a life of hoping for the weekend and not enjoying every present moment.

I am not sure if any of this makes sense, but thought a good ramble was needed.




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